Ask the Guy Next Door: What's a Fair Amount of Time to Go Down on a Guy?

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Ask the Guy Next Door: What's a Fair Amount of Time to Go Down on a Guy?

What's a fair amount of time to go down on a guy? Sometimes it seems like it takes more willpower than a sweaty cycling class! Alex, Dayton, OH

Well, if you're approaching it like you would a cycling class—repetitive motion, Tour de France intensity—it's bound to be exhausting. And when sex becomes a chore, it's easy to fall into mechanical habits. Consider tweaking your technique: Have you tried slowing down? Bringing in your hand? Teasing with your tongue? Departing from the routine will help your guy get off before your mouth starts begging for a time-out. If he's still slow to blow, start the next session by saying, "Tell me what you want." When he directs the show, he'll reach the finale sooner.

My guy and I recently moved in together, and he told me he misses having his own space. Are we doomed? Melody, Washington, D.C.

Unless by "space" he means "dating other women" (he didn't say that, did he?), you can probably get over this hump. A little relationship claustrophobia is harmless, but insisting on planning dinner with him every night and smothering him on the couch the second he sits down can really bother a guy (or a gal!). To have both romance and respect, hash out some reasonable expectations (like one date night a week). Agree to a balance that makes you both happy, and shacking up will feel like the best move ever.


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I am a student of Bangladesh National University (hon's) 1st year.

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