My Daughter Is Her Own Girl
While my eyes catch the bubbly, outgoing gals enjoying their friends in the sc
hool pick up line, my 7th grade daughter is standing off to the side, alone.
She is a total introvert.
In many ways, her anti-social behavior breaks my heart because she has a lot to offer, but it doesn't seem to bother her.
She shows up to school wearing capri pants with Van Gogh themed knee high socks, Dr. Who t-shirt, turquoise Converse, and Harry Potter buttons on her backpack strap. She has her own style.
Strangely enough, she totally pulls it off and strolls into class like "whatevs."
She shares how irritated she gets when class lets out and the girls squeal when they see each other.
Her reason? "Seriously, they just saw each other like an hour ago, what's the big deal?"
Or, how about this? "I really don't to be involved in girl drama or cliques."
Yes, she sounds a bit like a snob, which is a shame because there are some really great kids at her school, but it's her being honest with herself. I tell myself she is just choosing her friends carefully. Or something.
She has discovered a small group of students who pull out their books and read at lunchtime. I think some might be intrigued by her nonchalance, but the fact remains, she couldn't care less if someone doesn't talk to her.
Yesterday we had a rare moment of time for just the two of us, so we headed to our favorite bookstore. My daughter had a book in mind she really wanted. We couldn't find it. When I went to ask customer service. she went all, "I'm so embarrassed of my mom right now," on me. Even though she is cool in many ways, she is definitely a moody, self conscious tween who tends to treat me like an ass.
We learned the book was in the Feminist section of the bookstore. Wow. Is it wrong I felt a sudden little surge of pride in my girl? At almost 13 years old, this girl is starting to explore what it means to be an independent, strong, proactive young lady. You know what? Bring it on.
I wish I could have been a little more firm in my opinions at her age. I love she isn't following the popular trail of some her peers. This girl is forging her own way, and I really dig it.
Her latest handbook in navigating her independent path is, Geek Girls Unite - How Fangirls, Bookworms, Indie Chicks, And Other Misfits Are Taking Over The World, by Leslie Simon.
According to my daughter, this is THE book as the content apparently resonates with where she is in life. She told me she wanted me to read it because "I want you to know what I'm about and how I think about things."
If this is how my girl is communicating where she is coming from and owning her identity, I'll take it!
I find my daughter is leaning towards the road less traveled, but I believe it's the one more meaningful. She is remaining true to who she is and not becoming some media propagated "should be."
"Self -confidence goes a long way, and I think girls need to realize that at a young age. You have to discover on your own that you're cool in your own right, and you don't have to prove it to everyone."
- Bonnie Burton