Choose to be happy for its own sake. you don't need any other reason to do so. follow your passion, act on your excitement. be passionate about being passionate. act out your dream - as best as you can, do all the things, as best as you can to allow yourself to create the frequency of the reality you prefer even if it isn't manifesting yet. why am i not more passionate about my passion? Why am I not willing to do the things that everyone says will work? Why not? You must come face to face with your own identity your own physical mind, your own belief systems, definitions, issues, about what it is you are allowing to define you as a personality. what is it that you are choosing to believe in as a personality? The idea of letting go & surrendering is simply surrender to being who you actually are instead of who you have been taught to think you are suppose to be. all the struggling, all the suffering, all the doubt, all the fear, comes from the misunderstanding of who you are and thus resisting your natural self because you are afraid to give up that control from the physical mind to the greater self for which it was designed. Circumstances do not determine state of being, state of being determines circumstances. Circumstances don't matter, only state of being matters.