Why People Hate or Hurt Other People (1 of 3)

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Do you know why you try and/or choose to hurt other people? Are you aware why you hate your neighbor or that classmate or work colleague? Want to know why people hurt or hate you? Let's find out below! But first a definition of hate.


What is Hate?

(Photo credit via Pixabay)


Hate is a cultural and historical thing. If you read the Bible or any Holy Text, you will see that hatred (and deceit) have existed during the earliest days of man (OId Testament). Hate, like love, can be passed on to other people too, it can be easier to do such these days because of social media.

Here is a definition from Wikipedia.

Hatred or hate is a deep and extreme emotional dislike, especially invoking feelings of anger or resentment. It can be directed against individuals, groups, entities, objects, behaviors, or ideas.

It goes on to quote Dr. Sigmund Freud, who is considered to be the father of psychoanalysis, that hate is an ego state wherein you wish to destroy the source of your unhappiness. Meanwhile it also states that Penguin Dictionary of Psychology defines hate as "deep, enduring, intense emotion expressing animosity, anger, and hostility towards a person, group, or object."

Want to know what happens to your brain when you hate?

(Video credit: ThinkTank via YouTube)




Some Reasons Why You Hate/Hurt Other People

Tell me which one/s you recognize and reflect on whichever you do more of.

• You are a power tripper because you are worthless otherwise.

You like it when you are in control and when you can manipulate other people. You might be narcissistic too or you are plainly insecure and tries so very hard to hide it by overcompensating. You think that by reaching a high position or any leadership role makes you more important than the rest of the world. No one will step on you anymore, you will step on them instead.

Your ego is bigger and more important than your mind, heart or other things or people. There is only you and no one else because you are in charge, the one who decides what happens to who.

If you are the one in control then people who do not follow you will be fired from their jobs, removed from the team, ostracized from society because you said so and you are always right.


(Photo credit via Pixabay)


• Your belief system is different than others.

You don't believe in God or a Higher Being. You don't believe in karma. You don't care if other people are hungry as long as you are not. You don't care if the ocean gets polluted because you think you will not be affected. You believe there are aliens controlling the world. You don't believe in equality. You have no good thought for this world or anyone in it except yourself. You believe that whites are better than blacks. You believe that stealing is good. You worship Satan or other evil beings.

You let other people step on you just to please them because that will supposedly make them happy. You think you can do everything on your own. You think your friends are better than you. You think hurting others will make you happy. Who knows what else you believe in? 

human_behavior(Photo credit via Pixabay)



• You have several weaknesses/insecurities.

You are a very sensitive person, or worse, a cry baby that tries to act tough around others to make yourself feel better. You are the kind of person most prone to doing power trips on other people when given power in any form on any occasion.

You try to hide behind an anonymous online account and bash other people thinking it is the best way to hide your weaknesses and insecurities and that it will change other people. (If you can't change yourself, what makes you think you can change other people?) You bully others thinking it will make you strong and make you a powerful person when in reality you are simply afraid, mentally and emotionally weak, untalented or ashamed of yourself or your family and your status in life. 



• You only know how to hate and hurt other people.

what_is_hate(Photo credit via Pixabay)


You were raised in an environment where bullying is the norm. People in your neighborhood curse their friends or steal from neighbors all the time. Your family or friends taught you that doing crimes is good or that abusing and hurting others is better because they abused and hurt you too while growing up.

You grew up and were raised in an environment where justice is unheard of and that terrifying other people will bring you glory. Or you do not understand what love is because no one ever loved you or showed you what universal love is. You hurt other people intentionally or unintentionally because again, being loving, affectionate or caring is something you do not know or rarely experienced as a child or while growing up.

All these and more can give rise to psychopathy and post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). But what do you know about that? All you know is the world is a terrible place and that it's a dog eat dog world because anyone who tries to make you see the world is a good place to live in is wrong. You will make the world better by hurting everyone else or doing mass bombings to kill a lot of people etc., etc. Or worse, you will even kill yourself.


• You want other people to feel the hurt and pain you feel inside.

Because you have so much hurt and pain in your mind and heart, you don't want to be the only one suffering. It's only fair for other people to suffer too right? Why not because you suffered from the hands of others too, right?

If you're going down, you want to bring others down along with you. No one deserves happiness if you don't have happiness too. You want vengeance and nothing else. You take your revenge out on everyone else even if they are innocent and have not done anything to you.

why_people_hurt_other_people(Photo credit via Pixabay)


Or, the reason you hurt and abuse others is because you are trying to unconsciously ask for help from other people. You inflict pain in order to seek and gain attention so someone, anyone can help you. You are in pain so you try and find a way to get rid of the pain you are feeling. You know of no other way but to hurt others and that is a clear sign for those who become aware that you need some kind of intervention.


• Your motherly or fatherly instincts take over everything else.

As mothers and fathers know well, you will fight for the survival of your family members as long as you are alive. Even if you are not parents yet, this protective instinct is inherent in everyone, even in animals. This also applies to your friends and the oppressed people. You will hate those who inflicted pain and suffering on your loved ones and other people like you or your family and friends. You will hate them and seek revenge for the fulfilling feeling of avenging those who have hurt your children, your father, your mother, your cousin, your friend, your teacher, your lover, your assistant etc.

physiological_problem(Photo credit via Pixabay)


• You are bored and lonely so you play with people for entertainment.

You have nothing to do in life so you get bored. To have fun, you play with other people's feelings instead of things and objects. You don't like doing productive things because you think it is boring and stupid.

Or somebody paid you to hurt other people. You have nothing to lose because you think you are the best, no one will know. Even God will not care about what you do. You think you will never go to hell or get hurt by anyone for doing anything, whether you were paid (or not) to do something bad.




• Your brain or body is damaged or have abnormalities 

Emotions come from the brain. Having physical or body abnormalities can lead to different mindsets. Brain damage can cause you to be a completely different person. This can contribute to sociopathy, hormonal problems, physical deformities, etc., causing you to think and act or behave a different way than normal people do. 

Sociopaths do not have any normal fears or any feelings at all because some parts of their brain is damaged. Other people do not feel physical pain because parts of their brain or body is not normal.

If your physical body and/or your brain is not normal, the way you think will not be normal or moral too.


(Photo credit: National Institutes of Health via Wikipedia)



♦ Reasons Why People Will Hate or Hurt You ♦

On the other side of the coin, here are some reasons why people will hate or hurt you


• You have what others do not have.

This is one of the main reasons why people will hate and hurt you.

It may be that you have any or more of the following making you seem superior to everyone else:

  • more friends, fans or supporters
  • bigger finances
  • a higher power or position
  • superior skills and talents
  • physical beauty
  • a genius mind
  • etc.


(Well, we all want what we don't have. It always seems greener on the other side.)



(Photo credit via Pixabay)



• You cannot be controlled.

They cannot make you do whatever they want or need whether it is for the good of everyone or for their bad and selfish reasons.

They cannot make you love them, they cannot make you work as a slave or assistant, they cannot make you worship them, they cannot make you provide what they need or want, they cannot make you clean your room, they cannot make you help other people, they cannot make you stop polluting the ocean, they cannot make you stop being selfish etc.


• You are hard to understand.

You are doing things differently or the opposite of what others expect, like or believe in. They do not know what you know and are capable of so they will insult and hurt you or hate and ridicule or laugh at you for doing the things you do.

Perhaps it is the language barrier that is why people do not understand you. Or maybe it is their lack of education / knowledge or perhaps they are so much smarter than you that is why they attack or hate you. Whatever the case, people will always be afraid of what we do not understand. (When people are taken over by fear we do many irrational and immoral things to our fellow men.)

reason_why_you_hurt_others(Photo credit via Pixabay)



• You made other people feel insignificant, helpless and/or weak.

This is something we are all familiar with. People will hate you and retaliate if you made other people feel less than what or who they think they are, or if you made them see the error of their ways and that they cannot get away with their bad behavior. If they know they are doing wrong and you rub it in their faces and make them feel ashamed of themselves or their behavior, well expect some hatred or any form of retaliation from them. 

Or if people do not accept who they are and cannot accept other people as well, that will make them feel much more insignificant than before. Sometimes your behavior reminds them of other people who hurt them so they take it out on you.

insecure_people_are_bad(Photo credit via Pixabay)


If people cannot accept the system they are in or the system they want to be a part of, of course they will hate and try to hurt or destabilize it. Or they will try to convince or change the people in the system, whether it is you as an individual or the government, a website, a conglomerate or even a whole country!


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Sounds familiar?

Here's another perspective. Watch this video.

(Video credit: Osho International via YouTube)


If you've watched this video then let us all discuss about hate so we can destroy it's purity and dispel hate from each other. If we understand hate, we will know how to deal with it and therefore we can begin to change the hate back into good.


 * * * * * * * * * * 


After reading all that and watching the videos, what do you think can be done in order to end the hate/hurt cycle?  Feel free to leave a comment.

Stay tuned for my next blog where I will tackle those things and more. For the meantime let us reflect on our actions and behavior and think of a way to improve our mental and physical health and wellness one step at a time. 


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