The Perfect Son

A: I have the perfect son. 
B: Does he smoke? 
A: No, he doesn't. 
B: Does he drink whiskey? 
A: No, he doesn't. 
B: Does he ever come home late? 
A: No, he doesn't. 
B: I guess you really do have the perfect son. How old is he? 
A: He will be six months old next Wednesday

2:

A snail walks into a bar and the barman tells him there's a strict policyabout having snails in the bar and so kicks him out. A year later the same snail re-enters the bar and asks the barman "What did you do that for?" 

3:

ali: Just look at that young person with the short hair and blue jeans. Is it a boy or a girl? 
azam: It's a girl. She's my daughter. 
ali: Oh, I'm sorry, sir. I didn't know that you were her father. 
azam: I'm not. I'm her mother.

4:

Patient: Doctor, I have a pain in my eye whenever I drink tea. 
Doctor: Take the spoon out of the mug before you drink.