“To wish you are someone else is to waste the person you are.”  ~Sven Goran Eriksson

I have been studying business and marketing for quite some time now, watching the most successful men and women very carefully and picking apart how they’ve achieved what they’ve achieved.

I’ve read every book I can get my paws on and thought long and hard about why they have managed it and others just haven’t.

I’ve also seen many businesses and online brands mimicking exactly what those super successful people are doing, and I’ve wondered why they are a mere shadow on the wall in comparison.

I’ve realized one thing.

The super-successful people are doing exactly the same things as the not so successful people.

They use the same tools, blog about the same topics, and have the same personal development techniques. But they still do way better; they have more followers and fans that rave about their work and share it with everyone they know.

And it’s purely because they are rocking it in their own way. They are being their honest selves.

But how do they do that?!

I have been tormented with being myself all my life, struggling with the idea of liking myself and who I am.

I’ve been on a merry-go-round of trying to be someone or something that everyone will like. But I know that not everyone will like everything, so I’ve set myself an impossible task.

I also know that self-love and acceptance is the key to everything I want. Not just success, but to be happy with who I am—at last.

I often have this conversation with myself:

Hey, I’m weird. I don’t feel like I fit in anywhere. I feel as if people will always judge me for doing what I want and being me and only me.

What’s wrong with being me? I’m no good at being anyone else, so what’s the big deal? Well, maybe there isn’t a big deal?

Am I making a big deal?

Right, that’s it, I’m stopping this nonsense. I’m just going to be me…

But who the hell is “me”?!

Can I determine that by what I like? Or by my interests?

Or is it pure and simple my mannerisms, the way I look and the things I say?

Maybe it’s the way I think…?

Then I’m looping. On that never ending cycle of question after question.

And those questions never get answered.

The problem is, it is very difficult to know who you are and why you do things and where your crazy thought processes come from.

It’s impossible to put yourself into a category, but even so we’re constantly trying to categorize ourselves. Think of subcultures like goths or punks, and blogging tribes, and football teams. Everyone is trying to belong.

You see, the above dialogue that I have with myself is not to try and understand who I am, but to try and understand how I fit into this world.

I want to understand how I can offer something to the world, make a difference, be liked by the people I meet and, ultimately, belong. Just like those super successful people, but not them—just myself.

I’m not sure if human beings can ever really know themselves. We are constantly evolving, growing, changing. Especially people like us who are into personal development and enlightenment.

We are on fast-forward compared to people who don’t take much notice of developing themselves. So every few months we become a different person, who is the same person, with a lot more knowledge and different way of looking at the world.

It’s actually pretty mind-blowing!

We know that the beauty of ourselves is our individualism, our differences and the quirks that only we have. But at the same time we know that people are drawn to familiarity and like-mindedness. And this is where I personally get confused, because half the time I’m trying to be myself and the other half of the time I’m trying to fit in—or even worse, be someone who I’d like to be like!