My mom? She's the coolest person I've ever met. Caring, thoughtful, loving, best cook, best teacher, best EVERYTHING.
From the day I was born, she's the only person who never turned her back from me. I lied and give her so much pain and heartaches but still, she accepted me with all her heart, forgave me for all that I've done.
Regrets, that is what I'm feeling when she died 5 months ago.. Why regrets? Yes, we may be so closed with each other, but I've done NOTHING compare to her who DID EVERYTHING.. Sacrifices everything just to get me back when she and my dad separated when I was 8 years old.. Gave me everything to the extent that NOTHING WILL BE LEFT FOR HER, SO LONG AS I AM WELL PROVIDED..
When I fell down and got bruise on my knees, she was there..
When I first entered school, she was there..
When I entered High School, she was there..
When I graduated as Valedictorian, she may not be able to attend the ceremony bec. she's already stroke, I know, she was there..
Despite of my unruly behavior during my teenage years, she was there..
When I achieved all my medals and trophies at school, she was there..
When I failed Trigonometry, she was there..
When I smile, when I cry, when I had problems, she was there..
She isn't just a mother, she's my best friend, my adviser and even my sister.. She can be my everything..
She was the person who understand me when no one wants to..
She accepted all of me, my flaws, my strength and my weaknesses without questioning why do I have to be like this and that?
I envy her for being so strong knowing all that she's been through before she left us.. Fighting stroke is not easy, she had five attacks before she died which is very unusual, that's how I know that she was really fighting..
But now, she's gone.. All I can do is to reminisce every moment that she's with me and talk to her pictures.. Her voice, her laughter, her gestures and everything I will miss..
It's more painful that when I gave birth to my Athena Claire, realizing how painful and deadly it was to give birth, my mom wasn't there anymore to see her granddaughter who looks like me when I was a baby.. How can I thank her for bearing the pain of labor? The hours that she needs to breath just to make sure were both okay? The whole 9 months carrying me inside her?
HOW CAN I THANK HER FOR HER UNDYING AND UNCONDITIONAL LOVE?
For all the people who will read this, if you still have your mom, TREAT HER WELL, CARE FOR HER AND LOVE HER AS MUCH AS YOU CAN.. They are the only one and no one can replace our mothers.. Believe me, it's hard, no, it's EXTREMELY HARD losing a mom, I know 'coz I've been there.. Don't wait until regrets eat almost all of you because you didn't do the things that a son/daughter was supposed to do..
I may not see or touch her like the way I used to, she may not be able to witness all the events that will happen to me, I may not be able to tell her stories, I know deep inside my heart, that she's here.. And will always be here for the rest of my life..
I miss you mom, I LOVE YOU, and I always will..
